Decodificador 2

What liberals say: I’m tired of listening to religious nutcases and puritanical prudes trying to dictate what I do in the bedroom or what I can do with my body.	What conservatives hear: I’m a godless, amoral hedonist. Where’s the nearest drive-through abortion clinic?
What liberals say: The media does not have a liberal bias.	What conservatives hear: The earth is not round.
What liberals say: No war for oil.	What conservatives hear: My total comprehension of foreign policy is limited to four words.
What liberals say: We must fight for the people against the powerful.	What conservatives hear: The proletariat must rise up against the bourgeoisie, seize the means of production, and unite with the workers of the world.
What liberals say: Conservatives are all a bunch of warmongering, deficit-expanding, pollutionspewing, torture-sanctioning, civil liberty–seizing, New Orleans–abandoning, military-wrecking, Armageddon-yearning, fanatical bigots who have done more to destroy American democracy than Osama bin Laden ever dreamed.	What conservatives hear: I hate America, I hate freedom, and I hate myself.